Happy Birthday Stella!

So today has to be one of my favorite days of the year!! it is Megan's birthday so this means for the next 9 days she is older then me, silly I know but I love it! So of course it is only natural that this morning that I have to wish her a Happy Birthday and call her an "Old Bag", this will be paid back trust me there is no hard feelings and not the worst thing I have called her on her birthday. Has to be something new every year to keep it fresh.

I guess when you get older and have been friends as long as we have you just expect the person that knows you best in life to give you shit. So here's to Megan (aka Stella, this is her alias for when we become outlaws at the age of 85). Put the Rockin' Red lipstick on, smoke a virgin slim (thank you iPhone auto correct) and make that hair extra big today!

I couldn't do this life with out you! Hope you have a great day and that all of your wishes come true.

All My Love,

Bevy

Stubborn?

If you look up Stubborn in the dictionary there is a good chance you would see a picture of Megan and myself. Yes, we are hard headed but you know what I am blogging and it is because of her and I am doing this to light a fire under her ass as well.

I have been on hiatus from this blogging thing with nothing positive to say, well guess what it needs to be done positive or not right?

So I am still working on this chubby butt situation and to my surprise I am comfortably back into a 10. I am able to breath, buttons have not popped off and this should be good news... Well it's not, I have a pair of size 8 jeans in my closet laughing at me right now and they are really starting to piss me off! I need to exercise but really don't have the time and I really hate to exercise. So I have decided that I use to walk up and down 5 flights of stairs two to three times a day to go to and from work. So now I am going to do this at home, why can't I take the 15 minutes to my self and run up and down my stairs? I can it is just me being lazy and getting my ass up off the couch.

So tonight I am off to my stairs to see if I can get those size 8's to stop laughing at me.

Lifetime!

I am writing this today in honor of my best friend Megan. Because I want her to know she has a "LIFETIME" with her all the time. Like they say "Friends are like angels, you know their, there even though you can't see them".

Megan is the sister I was never biologically blessed with. Fortunate for me we were thrown together by god and we were made sister's as he knew we needed each other. I love her as much and more then if we were blood. I just want her to remember her self worth and how sweet she is. She has been in as what she calls it a "Funk" and I want to do anything I can to try and lift her out of it. As this is what we both do for each other, when one is dealt lemons the other is there with the Vodka saying lets make this a party!

To my dearest Megan, you don't need the Reasons or Seasons because you have plenty of Lifetimes that will get you through the Reasons and Seasons you meet along the way. I know you are in the midst of your pity party, but let's put our big girl panties on and GO! 

So now I will leave you with this last little note.


B-I-N-G-O !

Lost....

Have you ever felt like no matter what you do and how hard you try it is never good enough? That is where I am at with my job right now. I give, give, give and just get shit on repeatedly. I work with a bunch of 60 + year old women that really need to retire. They are too busy living 25 years ago in the finance world to move ahead. The bad word of the day "change", I am sorry but I am a firm believer that CHANGE is always good and if it going to make my life better WOOHOO! Not these old bitches, fight it tooth and nail and the ball less men that makes up the management team let them push and continue to do it. Really, this is my career right now...

Still losing, still trying to exercise, still keeping my food journal. So today I will just keep on, keepin' on.

Spanx you very much!

I swear this morning when I was putting on my underwear I heard them say:  How much does she really think we can stretch? Let alone hold this load up! Another morning, another day of holding up clothes and saying will it fit or am I going to end up crying over it. Thank god it is warm out and I can get another day out of my big girl capri's.

This weekend was a bust for the Chubby Buddy adventure for Healthy Living... I may or may not have eaten a whole small white pizza with out even batting an eye. I said I would not deprive myself of anything but the Friday night binge had me regretting it all weekend. I am off to a good start this morning, back on track with my food journal. Rain please hold off so I can get a nice bike ride in after work with my little man.

On a lighter note my 7 year old and I are out shopping and he is not paying very close attention and I seem to be saying Jayden stay with Mama, Jayden please stay here with me. Finally anxiety at it's peak I say Jayden can you please just stay here with Mama you are giving me chest pains! With no hesitation and with out a blink of his little eye. He says well you know what? You are giving me heart pains! I almost died! After holding in my laughter and looking at his little smirk an older lady that got the free show, she looked at us smiled and said life is to short to Hurry all the time. After that we slowed down and the pains were gone and both left with a little giggle and smiles on our faces.

Fat Feet...

Another day another pair of cute shoes thrown to the back of my closet into the graveyard. Black, suede pumps that I can't even squeeze my feet into... Depressed is the feeling. On to the pants. It is chilly out and I have to wear pants, really this should be fun. One leg at a time I put them on wondering if I should open a window in case I break out in a hot flash trying to get these damn things on. Up over the chubby buns with no wiggling and I don't have to lay on the bed to button them! SUCCESS! Yes it is only a little feat but I will take it. This really makes me happy but what is a nice pair of dress slacks with no cute pumps to wear. I vowed not to buy any clothes in a bigger size do I do the same with my shoes? But a girl at least needs cute shoes to make her feel better.

In true best friend fashion Megan has been sending me links all day of the cutest damn shoes. It wouldn't be bad but they are cute and cheap. Now the madness begins, do I really need them? NO! Do I want them? YES! I always tell my son there is a difference between wanting and needing... Now I am trying to tell myself the same thing.

Off for a little snack, maybe this will take my mind of the shoes. If you haven't tried them yet the Weight Watchers Ginger Snaps are WONDERFUL!

Is this as good as it gets?

A week into the Chubby Buddies and I feel myself slowly falling into a little funk... I am eating well, parking further away, riding my bike and it just doesn't seem to be enough right now. I am not the most patient person in the world and I like results immediately! Is this holding me back from my full potential? I mean my pants are a little looser and that usually make me happy.

W. (my behaviorist) is trying his hardest to make me mentally sound and healthy and it is my responsibility to get my body healthy. Today though I am asking myself really "Is this as good as it gets?". I am at odds with my job and whether I should move my cheese or ride out the storm in hopes that blue skies are ahead? Is there ever a time when you personal life and career could sync up to be good at the same time. Today my answer to how's it going? Same shit different pile, that's all I got.

As I told my good friend who is trying to get her "sweetness" back is your To SWEET to be SOUR. Guess I should take my own advice.

Tomorrow is another day and maybe this rain has washed me out. So if this as good as it gets, I guess I will have to work with it.